40 Days of Friendship – Day 14: Hangovers and Freudian Slips

IMG_7001IMG_6998OKAY, SO – STORY TIME: I was thinking about what to write on the left hand side about the post and the title of the article is the ‘Dating Apocalypse’ and I was thinking of this as I was writing out the #40DaysOfFriendship on the right hand side, which as you can now see, I combined the thought and the action to come up with #40DaysOfDating. It’s been a long day and I am clearly a mono-tasker. Anyway. On with the post.

CAL

1. Did you talk to SAO today?

We texted. First text from SAO: “I am hungover.” Later we discussed a Vanity Fair* article, “The End of Dating” which was about Tinder and the modern hookup culture. I’ve realised recently that I’m kind of over it… and I also think it has become bad for the general dating culture and relationships. But I don’t think SAO is over it haha.

We also discussed some drama that has been happening with her and her close friend. Which sounds like SAO is getting the silent treatment from her friend. Which I can only assume to mean her friend is mad at her but SAO doesn’t know specifically what for. I tried giving advice, but not much I can really do there as I’m not really friends with this other girl.

2. Anything interesting happen? 

SAO got further in her job offer. This is exciting – and maybe I’ll even get to fly out there and go visit that beautiful place.

3. Learn anything new about SAO?

She can apparently cook and is holding out on me! she sent me a photo of poached eggs on toast so I have proof. I love to make generalisations and I learned that SAO does not like my generalisations.

4. Learn anything new about yourself?

I learned that I’m officially over the hookup culture. Reading that article was a good reminder to me that it’s unfulfilling and not really worth it. 

5. Additional comments

*Disclaimer – I don’t read Vanity Fair, just an article I saw linked.

SAO

Did you talk to Cal today?

I did. A LOT. Exclusively via text. 

2. Anything interesting happen? 

We covered a huge spectrum of topics…I’m going to be extremely lazy and just post our whole conversation below. And by ‘extremely lazy’ I mean that it actually took me well over two hours to go through all of our texts, screen shot them, crop them, and email them to myself. 

3. Learn anything new about Cal?

Not something new per se, but when we were fourteen I said that I wanted to cut off all of my hair and have a pixie cut and he said, ‘No, don’t!’ and when I asked why he said, ‘Because I like your hair.’ I don’t know why that sticks out in my memory bank, but at the time it was pretty much the only nice thing a boy had said to me about my appearance in awhile so I remember it making feel good about myself. So later when you see me telling him that I don’t care about his opinion on my hair, it’s not entirely true…And actually since that day I’ve just grown my hair longer. 

4. Learn anything new about yourself?

My first reactions to conflict come across as very angry. This will make sense later in the context of my draft text messages to Charlie which I ran by Cal first. I’m definitely glad I asked him about it because I think at the time my replies wouldn’t have made the situation better. This was the preamble to the posts I made about the breakup with my best friend, so it’s a bit more of the backstory to what happened.

5. Additional comments 

Still pretty sore about the situation with Charlie and I still don’t completely understand why she decided to cut me out of her life. But more than that, I’m glad that I’ve been friends with Cal for so long and had him there to advise me on everything from hair styles to breakups. 

Without further adieu…here is another day in the life of our friendship as told by our text messages.

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Yeah, that’s right – I cook food! 

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Here’s the link again if your lazy arse didn’t read it the first time:

Tinder and the Dawn of the “Dating Apocalypse”

 

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(For the next bit it’s important to note that K is Bully and C is Bor…should’ve just used that from the beginning but I forgot that I had texted him using code names, knowing that it would be going into the blog. OH. WELL.)

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(I later realised the error of my hungover ways on the 14th day of this experiment…)

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I then realised that it had been five months since I had seen my best friend, Charlie and told Cal as much.

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I sent this gif because it’s my answer to most things in life…

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Cal reminded me about his relationship with one of his best friends from childhood who had been a mutual friend. Long story short, the guy was a total dick and had become a completely different person from who we knew and thennnnn he started dating Cal’s childhood sweetheart and made it seem like it was no big deal. Cal said that he didn’t explain why he stopped being friends with him, just basically cut him out of his life. So then I said…

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We talked about how I saw her husband more than her and even went to the venue with him to check out the space for catering since she was busy with her PhD. Also that I wasn’t blind and knew that one of the bridesmaids didn’t like me, but didn’t want to bother Charlie with that information or one-sided drama (on the other bridesmaid’s part) since she was busy with work and planning a wedding. 


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Right after sending that I got a text from Charlie which I immediately forwarded to Cal. This conversation topic came up because I had texted Charlie asking if I could call her and she didn’t respond so I had to text her that I had been offered a job abroad and that I would probably be leaving London, which she still didn’t reply to until…

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I did ask myself this numerous times, but according to all the guests that I know (including my parents and godparents), I did not. I was even told that I gave one of the best speeches anyone had ever heard at a wedding, but WHO KNOWS. Anyway, I started drafting a text to reply to her and sent Cal the preliminary response:

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(Still need to change my iPhone’s language setting since it autocorrects ‘mum’ to ‘mom’…fuckin Apple and their US English default)

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I couldn’t call Cal because I was having some friends over to my flat for a clothing swap…which Cal mistook me for saying that I was going to a charity shop apparently.

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A friend of mine had cut off all of of her hair into a cool haircut and shaved one of the sides so I was telling Cal I was thinking of getting that hairstyle as well.

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I was kind of drunk (again – tsk, tsk) from the clothes swap so I passed out before I got the last message, but my hairdresser would indeed rule the world if he could do makeup as well. I’m like 90% sure he can do makeup and is just being modest, but I suppose I’ll find out someday. 

Anyway, that’s all for today. I was sick the past couple of days hence the lack of updates and then ambitiously tried to catch up all at once which lead to a bit of a breakdown and general giving up on life for that evening, but the plan is to do two posts per day until I catch up. There was reason in the madness when it came to which day I started this project on.

Until tomorrow, farewell x

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