No, it’s me. It’s definitely me and my paranoia, but here is some backstory to why that is exactly.
As aforementioned, I trust Grey. I trust him completely. It’s other girls I don’t trust.
Why? You may ask. Well, because remember when I told you about how The Ex’s ‘lover’ stalked me? She did, but in a ‘I’m your friend!’ kind of way. She tried to make nice, but only in order to get more information about The Ex and try to sabotage my relationship with him. I didn’t even know she was close with The Ex when she started chatting to me, but she seemed nice enough and then one night she asked if I wanted to go to dinner with her and that’s when her obvious fishing for details on The Ex began. Sneaky tart.
Cat is not like this girl. Actually, she is kind of like this girl in that I think she has a crush on my boyfriend. But other than that, her and I were friends before I began dating Grey and I don’t think she has a malicious bone in her body. I am more upset with myself than with her because I see myself creating this fictitious world in my head where she’s out to get me (well, out to get Grey) and that’s not the case. Not realistically at least, because c’mon. It’s me. Who would leave me for someone else?
**Side note – as soon as I wrote that I was thinking of deleting it because sometimes sarcasm doesn’t come across too well, then Grey called and I got distracted for a prolonged period of time then I came back and read it and it doesn’t sound so bad, so I stand by my statement.
Anyway. The Cat-Grey thing was bothering me way more than it should have, and it was only because I momentarily slipped back into psychotic-girlfriend mode which The Ex drove me to after a year of dealing with him and his lies. Grey did nothing wrong, and in fact he called the next day to admit to everything that happened between him and Cat, which was nothing to be honest. The degree to which he felt the need to explain himself was actually quite endearing.
I stopped him mid-explanation because the story was boring me. ‘It’s okay. I trust you.’
‘Exactly,’ he said.
When I would tell The Ex ‘I trust you’ it was more of a test to see if he felt guilty or would confess to something. With Grey there are none of the games. ‘I trust you’ means that I trust him. When I said he reminds me of The Ex in certain ways, it in no way was it in the way The Ex made me feel (i.e., paranoid and depressed). Grey is so many things The Ex is not, namely a good boyfriend. He’s not bad in bed either, but that’s a given. I don’t think anyone would believe for a second that I would keep someone around who was bad in bed.
I think a good lesson to have learned from The Ex and his crazy harem of women (myself included) is that no man is worth that kind of drama. It should be easy, and boyfriends should call you to confess to things that don’t really matter instead of hiding everything that does.
Next time, something more light: Why Boyfriends Make You Fat.
… kind of makes the adjective ‘light’ seem ironic.
I’ll use an extreme before and after visual for you to represent pre-boyfriend and post-boyfriend.