It’s not Me, it’s Her.

No, it’s me. It’s definitely me and my paranoia, but here is some backstory to why that is exactly.

As aforementioned, I trust Grey. I trust him completely. It’s other girls I don’t trust.

Why? You may ask. Well, because remember when I told you about how The Ex’s ‘lover’ stalked me? She did, but in a ‘I’m your friend!’ kind of way. She tried to make nice, but only in order to get more information about The Ex and try to sabotage my relationship with him. I didn’t even know she was close with The Ex when she started chatting to me, but she seemed nice enough and then one night she asked if I wanted to go to dinner with her and that’s when her obvious fishing for details on The Ex began. Sneaky tart.

Cat is not like this girl. Actually, she is kind of like this girl in that I think she has a crush on my boyfriend. But other than that, her and I were friends before I began dating Grey and I don’t think she has a malicious bone in her body. I am more upset with myself than with her because I see myself creating this fictitious world in my head where she’s out to get me (well, out to get Grey) and that’s not the case. Not realistically at least, because c’mon. It’s me. Who would leave me for someone else?
**Side note – as soon as I wrote that I was thinking of deleting it because sometimes sarcasm doesn’t come across too well, then Grey called and I got distracted for a prolonged period of time then I came back and read it and it doesn’t sound so bad, so I stand by my statement.

Anyway. The Cat-Grey thing was bothering me way more than it should have, and it was only because I momentarily slipped back into psychotic-girlfriend mode which The Ex drove me to after a year of dealing with him and his lies. Grey did nothing wrong, and in fact he called the next day to admit to everything that happened between him and Cat, which was nothing to be honest. The degree to which he felt the need to explain himself was actually quite endearing.

I stopped him mid-explanation because the story was boring me. ‘It’s okay. I trust you.’

‘Exactly,’ he said.

When I would tell The Ex ‘I trust you’ it was more of a test to see if he felt guilty or would confess to something. With Grey there are none of the games. ‘I trust you’ means that I trust him. When I said he reminds me of The Ex in certain ways, it in no way was it in the way The Ex made me feel (i.e., paranoid and depressed). Grey is so many things The Ex is not, namely a good boyfriend. He’s not bad in bed either, but that’s a given. I don’t think anyone would believe for a second that I would keep someone around who was bad in bed.

I think a good lesson to have learned from The Ex and his crazy harem of women (myself included) is that no man is worth that kind of drama. It should be easy, and boyfriends should call you to confess to things that don’t really matter instead of hiding everything that does.

Next time, something more light: Why Boyfriends Make You Fat.

… kind of makes the adjective ‘light’ seem ironic.

I’ll use an extreme before and after visual for you to represent pre-boyfriend and post-boyfriend.



Oh dear. Off to sleep so I can get up early and go for a run.

15 Responses to “It’s not Me, it’s Her.”

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  1. Anonymous says:

    >I'm not being pedantic but I remember you said you hate bad spelling and grammar. well you missed the letter 'd' off the word 'bed' in the 8th paragraph.

    also another great post.

  2. Sex @ Oxbridge says:

    >Good catch! I try and proof read it at least twice, but nobody's perfect. I'm very close though … Thanks for the note xxx

  3. Anonymous says:

    >Great Blog. Following you from Germany. I love the way you express yourself! Awesome!!

  4. "Pink Bear" says:

    >Another pedantic spelling mistake: 3rd paragraph, it's "your" not "you're". Sorry!
    Love what you write though. x

  5. Sex @ Oxbridge says:

    >I had to re-read it about three times before I found the 'you're' … thanks though! x

  6. Simple Chaos. says:

    >I understand completely about the Ex.
    I went through the same or at least, similar problem with my ex-girlfriend. For a long while, I couldn't really trust any women but it's slowly going due to knowing the fact that no-one is exactly like that.

    Take care.

  7. vjs says:

    >You pour your heart out and all the comments you get are about grammar !

  8. Phoebe says:

    >Right, I get what you’re feeling now, on the last post I was trying to piece together what you were feeling, but it’s much clearer now understanding your dislike to other girls being overly friendly since the stalker girl did that to. That is the biggest kick in the face having the girl who is sleeping with your boyfriend actually befriending you to find out about your relationship when she’s having a sexual one with him. I think it’s so sad some people stoop that low, but worse that others let it happen, like your ex.
    But seriously, Oxy, Grey sounds like such a sweetheart, telling you every detail with what happened between him and Cat. Maybe you should just think of their relationship in the same way as your friend’s girlfriends view you. Everyone’s a little cautious, despite trusting each other, because you’re worried about what that the other person could seduce your partner. He really cares for you, that much is clear from your descriptions of him and how he is different from your past relationships and flings.
    I cringed at the sight of Britany on the second picture, just not a good look!! You’re so right about that though, girls let themselves go when post-boyfriend. Can’t wait for that one :D
    Love Phoebe x
    P.S obviously you’d win a cat fight, I wouldn’t doubt you for a second :P

  9. Kate says:

    >Another great post! :)

    xoxo Kate

  10. Anonymous says:

    >Loving the blog keep it up, Johannesburg South Africa

  11. Anonymous says:

    >Errr you've turned psycho mental bitch! Isn't this blog ment to be about sex?

  12. Anonymous says:

    >You do know the Britney 'photo' is quite badly photoshopped?

  13. Anonymous says:

    >"it in no way was it in the way". Too many its methinks. But fab post!

  14. Anonymous says:

    >Er, Phoebe, not sure that suggesting SAO views Cat as her friends' girlfriends view her is such a good idea given the whole Dill situation…No offence SAO.

  15. Rupa says:

    Have Latest Romance videos?

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