Reasons I’ve Broken Up with People: No. 8

8. He smelled like baby powder and it started to repulse me.

Last year I wrote “Stay Single: Do Whatever You Want” and outlined one of the most ideal relationships I’ve ever had, which was basically with a guy who I was hooking up with consistently but not exclusively for just over a year. He was very attractive, and that’s what drew me to him in the first place. He was also nice and good in bed and there was exactly no drama ever between us.

One of the main reasons I think I was never bothered about making the relationship even a little bit serious is because I know that when I’m deeply attracted to someone on like a base, chemical level, that they smell like honey biscuits. I’m aware how banana insane that sounds, but it is what it is. There is another smell that I’ve found to be associated with people I’m attracted to visually and compatible with sexually, but that I don’t know how to explain it except that the smell makes me sick. And that smell is baby powder.

This guy smelled so strongly of baby powder that at times I thought I was going to gag. It’s not even that bad of a smell, it’s not like he smelled like garbage, but it’s just this sickly sweet smell that I couldn’t stand. And it wasn’t even his aftershave or anything, he could’ve just gotten out of the shower, met me after work, been at a club all night, it didn’t matter. He always smelled like baby powder, and after a rummage through his bathroom it was clear he didn’t own any, let alone douse himself in the stuff, so I’m not sure what that means other than the smell actually repelled me.

I never said that this was going to be a logical list of reasons, but they are all true. And this is the reason that I no longer even consider hooking up with someone if they smell like baby powder.

What are you thinking?