Party People

‘Slow down!’ I said, hobbling precariously along a cobblestone walkway in my heels. ‘What’d you have to wear those fuckin’ shoes for you dickhead?’ Foster said, grabbing my hand and pulling me along as he simultaneously held my balance for me. ‘They make my legs look good.’ ‘But you can’t walk!’ ‘Not on cobblestone I can’t!’ ‘This whole fucking city is made of cobblestone!’ ‘Her legs do look good though.’ Trinity agreed. ‘Women.’ Goodge said, shaking his head. ‘Makes your bum look nice as well, by the way.’ He added. ‘See?’ I said, clutching to Foster’s hand for dear life. ‘How many beers did you have in Trinity’s room for fuck’s sake? You can’t even walk a straight line!’ Foster said. ‘Don’t judge me! I had the same as all of you.’ ‘Yeah, but you’re about half our size.’ ‘Then maybe you shouldn’t buy me so much beer next time.’ ‘Alright, princess, you get the beer next time then!’ Goodge said. ‘Agh!’ I said, tripping. ‘Fffff-ucking hell.’ Foster said, holding me up. ‘Come here,’ Goodge said locking his arm through mine. A few minutes later and we were on solid pavement. ‘Phew!’ I said, releasing my kung fu grip on [...] There's more...

Poor Effort

The latch on the door to Russ’ building had been broken for days. I pushed it open and walked through the hallway and to his room. Music was blaring loudly from behind the door and I banged loudly. ‘Yeah? Come in!’ I pushed the door open and he craned his head around to see who it was. When he saw me a large smile broke out across his face and he said, ‘Hel-lo.’ I smiled back. ‘Hey there.’ I hadn’t seen him since we had slept together the week before. ‘How’s it going?’ ‘Great. Things are good.’ ‘Really? Glad to hear it.’ I paused for a second, taking in the sight in front of me. He was wearing jeans and no t-shirt and all his curtains were closed. ‘… Why aren’t you wearing a shirt?’ ‘Because it’s well hot in here.’ ‘Why don’t you open a window.’ ‘It is open.’ ‘Open the curtains maybe?’ ‘I can’t.’ He said. ‘Seeing the sunlight just makes me want to be outside.’ I went to the window and peered outside. ‘It is quite bright out there.’ ‘I literally have to wear my sunnies when the window is open.’ ‘Yeah, but it would be cooler [...] There's more...

Redemption

As I waited for my coffee order at the far end of the bar in Starbucks I heard a familiar voice behind me. ‘What are you doing?’ I turned around and saw Grey standing there. ‘Preparing for a nuclear holocaust.’ I said, staring him straight in the eyes. He blinked at me, unamused. ‘What does it look like I’m doing? I’m getting coffee. Just like pret-ty much everyone else in this place. I think that’s what it’s here for. To give people coffee.’ ‘Alright smartarse, I meant what are you doing in this Starbucks. I never see you here.’ ‘Well you see, I was walking from just over there,’ I pointed out the window, ‘saw the Starbucks right here,’ I pointed to the floor, ‘and thought “I want coffee in my life. Today. Right now.” And so I changed course and came into this very Starbucks, unaware that it was “your” Starbucks.’ ‘It isn’t “my” Starbucks, but it’s near my college, which is over there,’ he said, mocking me and pointing towards his college. It’s nowhere near your college.’ ‘Yes, well I do tend to leave that place from time to time and venture out into the big great beyond [...] There's more...

The Best Way to Get Over Someone is to Get Under Someone Else

I stared at my ceiling, waiting for my phone to start buzzing and beeping with the alarm. I had been awake for around ten minutes, as having left my curtains wide open had ensured that I woke up once the room was filled with light. Luckily this occurred sometime around 5:48 in the morning. I refused to get out of bed before six, not wanting to face the terrible reality of the day ahead, which was essentially working from 6:30 to 3:30 in an attempt to finish (and when I say “finish” I mean “start”) an assignment that was due by four and worth a substantial percentage of one of my papers. My phone began buzzing and ringing across the room and I wedged myself out of the arrangement of pillows and duvet around me. I like to sleep surrounded by pillows on both sides of me; it’s like sleeping in a giant down-filled, cloud-like hug. I picked up the pillow off the floor that had either gone rogue or been kicked away by me in the night and threw it on the bed before silencing my alarm. I sat at my desk in the world’s most uncomfortable chair and [...] There's more...

Bereavement

In Hannah Bett’s column “Things you only know if you’re single” in the Times Magazine yesterday she wrote: … that one never stops believing in fairytales. When you meet the One, you will be at your chubbiest. Your nails will be raged. There will be something on your sweater. Your hair will be doing that weird, flat thing that it does. You won’t be wearing your favourite clothes. You are likely to be spitting as you talk. Alcohol will probably be involved. There will be chewing gum stuck to your shoe. It took less than a minute of speaking to Dale when we first met to realise that I was about to fall head over heels for him. We didn’t spend an incredible amount of time together that evening, but the second time we met was the next day, and as I read Hannah’s article I immediately thought of the encounter. It was a Sunday evening and I had been sitting in college trying to finish an essay that was due that day, but which I knew I probably wouldn’t finish before three in the morning. Like the responsible and upstanding student that I am, I had stopped by the [...] There's more...

Here Comes the Groom

‘Hello!’ I said, kissing my long lost love hello. ‘How’s my girl?’ He said, kissing me back. This boy, well, actually he’s more of a man now. This man can’t really be categorised as a dog breed, or a name, or an anything. He was the first person I really fell in love with. Oh god, I loved him so much. We were so young though, and I was quite stupid at the time. Still a virgin, still didn’t know what I wanted from anyone. Our relationship was quite immature, we were such good friends that we decided not to ruin it by dating. Still, we would sleep at each other’s places all the time, and he was the first boy I consistently shared a bed with. I was madly in love with him, but scared that it wouldn’t be reciprocated, so I never tried it on with him. Long story short it carried on for way too long until one day he pulled another girl and I got angry and he said, ‘You know, you can’t get mad every time I look at another girl.’ At which point I said, ‘You know what, I’m not your girlfriend, I don’t [...] There's more...

Lad Time

‘Ok, shhh, shhhhh!’ Briony said in a loud whisper, laughing. ‘My parents are asleep.’ She put the key in the lock and it was as if that key had never been louder. Partially due to her fumbling around to get it in to begin with, she finally connected key with hole, resulting in a loud smash of metal against metal at the back of the lock. We tried to suppress laughter as she turned the key and opened the door. As the door creaked loudly I whispered, ‘Shut up, door!’ Which was then followed by her dog bounding in, barking. ‘Shhh, shhh!’ Briony hissed at the dog, but the laughter that accompanied it took away any authority in her voice. The dog jumped and barked excitedly and once we got him to calm down we stood in the dark for a moment waiting to hear if we had woken anyone up. After a minute of reassuring silence we switched the light in the kitchen on, having come in through the back door. Staying with Briony reminded me of being a teenager and sneaking around all the time. For some reason every time we came down to breakfast I felt like [...] There's more...

Whinging at Oxbridge

… aka, what the blog should temporarily be named. And for that, I apologise. I realise that I may have left out some details from the previous post which could better explain Dale’s actions aside from simply putting it down to him being horrible to me. I made it seem as if he went away to go out on the lash for a weekend, but that simply wasn’t the case. Regardless, both of us could have dealt with certain things in a much better way. I had returned home early on Sunday as planned, not allowing myself to revolve my schedule around Dale’s ambiguous plans. Telling me that he would be back “sometime on Sunday” was not good enough and I drove home before he had even left London. I drove along in silence, admiring the countryside. I love the beginning of spring. Everything is so green and new. A new start for everything. I wished that I could go through annual phases like the trees and start over every spring. No such luck. As much as I didn’t want to start over, I already had. By taking myself away from uni I had conceded to Dale’s wishes. I knew what I [...] There's more...

Missed Communications

‘I really just don’t understand what happened the last two weeks we were together. How did everything go from being fine to you just completely ignoring me and subsequently dumping me?’ ‘I wasn’t ignoring you.’ Dale said, confused. ‘But you were. You were so concerned about not excluding any of our friends or making anyone uncomfortable that you completely isolated me.’ ‘I’m really sorry, I didn’t mean to do that.’ ‘You keep saying that you’re worried that we’ll get hurt, but if you were actually worried about me getting hurt you wouldn’t break up with me. You’re afraid of getting hurt. Why did you freak out as soon as things seemed a bit serious?’ Dale sighed. ‘I really don’t know. I don’t know why I did it.’ ‘I understand if you need time, but I need to know if your decision is finite in your mind or if you feel like someday we could get back together.’ ‘Of course it’s not finite. I still like you. Like I said, it isn’t you. I have to, have to, do well in my exams and I just can’t see that happening if we carry on as we were.’ ~ Or something like [...] There's more...